Never say never

By Melissa Blanton  

AUGUST 12, 2011 9:43 a.m. (0)

That’s what Thomas Maness noticed most on that day a little more than a month ago when he finally moved in with his new foster parent, Anthony Sartor.

Maness had been living at Glenn Springs Academy, a Pauline group home for as many as 32 boys, ages 10-21 who have been abused, neglected or abandoned by their parents.

For Sartor, 33, human services professional at Glenn Springs, the change was subtler. He’s home in the evenings now, making sure Maness, 18, is back safely from his job at Spartan Industries in Pacolet where he washes and repairs industrial-sized ball bearings.

Their brick home is tidy, inside and out. Hardwood floors with patterned in-lays. Freshly painted walls a warm, light brown.

The muted sounds of ESPN’s “Around the Horn.”

In the kitchen, the dishes are done and the countertops are spotless.

Likely candidate

Sartor’s journey to foster parent began years ago. He was an accounting student at the University of South Carolina in Columbia and decided to transfer to the Spartanburg campus.

After graduating from USC, Sartor took a job at a small accounting firm in Spartanburg.

That’s when a friend invited him along to the Boys and Girls Club at Mary H. Wright Elementary to volunteer. He played basketball and at first, he says the experience was a little scary.

But after that one trip, Sartor was hooked.

“My heart started changing,” he said.

He loved the kids. The opportunity to have an impact on youth who were full of questions and ready to learn.

After graduating from USC, Sartor took a job at a small accounting firm in Spartanburg. After two years, and 70- to 80-hour weeks during tax season, he needed glasses due to eyestrain and a change of pace.

“I wasn’t happy,” he said. “It’s a pretty stuffy profession.”

He returned to his volunteering roots, going to work at the Boys and Girls Club.

Then he spent a year at the Department of Juvenile Justice. But the work was, as Sartor describes it, stressful and challenging.

Again a friend, who knew his heart for youth and his volunteering background at the Boys and Girls Club, suggested he look into a wilderness camp in Jonesville. During his first visit he was offered a job.

Working at a home for youth is a different kind of calling. For Sartor it begins with recognizing that the young people who end up there have for the most part been given up on.

“I don’t want to give up on them. I don’t want to be one of those,” he said.

In 2006, Sartor decided to move closer to home, taking the job at Glenn Springs.

The academy began in 1971 as Spartanburg Boys Home as an alternative to the Department of Juvenile Justice. The boys who can go to school attend Spartanburg District 6. There is an on-campus school for those who can’t.

Sartor decided to become a foster parent because he felt like it was time to take his passion for helping young people succeed to the next level.

Maness’ story helped him make the choice.

His story

When he was 12, Thomas Maness was told he wouldn’t see his parents again. The state was taking away their parental rights, and Maness would be placed in foster care.

He was removed due to issues with neglect.

Ask him what that day was like and he quietly says it was hard.

Before anyone can dwell on how hard it truly must have been, he’s moving on to what he’s told himself dozens of times.

“Acting out wasn’t going to change anything.”

Maness has been in the foster care system for half a dozen years or so. When asked how many foster homes he’s lived in, he pauses and counts silently in his head. Seven, he says.

Being in that many different homes is not typical, said Sartor. Some of the factors for moving a child include whether the foster home is equipped to help the child as well as specific requests from the Department of Social Services.

Out of the norm

Sartor recalls his first meeting with Maness. He noticed his attitude. It wasn’t like most of the young people Sartor worked with. Maness was neither hardened nor disrespectful.

Instead, there was a simmering determination just visible to those who took the time to look.

“This is not something that we see every day,” said Sartor.

Among the traits that set Maness apart was the fact he had plans and dreams.

He was going to college.

He was going to own a business.

Maybe a traveling DJ company.

“When I was a kid, people tried to discourage me,” he said.

They told him since his parents never went to college, he wouldn’t either.

The negativity didn’t sway him, though. “Their putting me down made me want to do it more,” he said.

Future, now

Maness is enrolled at Spartanburg Community College where he plans to major in business management. Once his two years are completed, he wants to move on and earn his four-year degree.

He’s working full time at the factory in Pacolet.

In the evenings Sartor has been teaching him how to create – and live by – a budget.

The process for Sartor to become Maness’ foster parent took more than a year, said Sartor.

The process is involved and, in his case, some paperwork was not received and had to be resubmitted. There was also the fact Sartor was taking custody of a child that was not his biologically.

Sartor credits his DSS caseworker with helping him navigate the process and finalize a new home for Maness.

The pair are settling into routines. Maness is a fan of “Two and a Half Men,” Sartor is a self-described basketball junkie.

They have a similar sense of humor and easy-going manner.

They’re music buffs and as it turns out, said Sartor, their musical tastes are starting to rub off on one another.

Author to be

To encourage young people who are in similar situations, Maness is working on a children’s book.

He’s got dozens of books stacked neatly on the coffee table. He spends time each evening reading through them, making notes on what he likes and how he can craft his own. The main character will be a younger version of himself – mini Thomas, he says with a laugh.

Most of all, he wants people to know that dreams are simply reality waiting to happen, including his own.

“I’m not going to stop until I fulfill them,” he said.

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